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The Power of Self-Kindness




Be Good To Yourself - Paper Napkin Wsdom
Be Good to Yourself

Building Resiliency and Confidence


In the high-pressure world of professional sports, mental resilience can make the difference between success and failure. This NHL postseason, Connor Brown exemplified this truth with a breakout performance that was instrumental in his team's journey to within a goal of the Stanley Cup. His story highlights the profound impact of self-kindness on performance and resilience.

Brown’s journey wasn’t always smooth. Early in his career, he struggled with self-criticism, often being his harshest critic after a poor game.


During his time in Toronto, his performance dipped, and he found himself traded to the Ottawa Senators. However, it was advice from teammate Patrick Marleau that became a turning point for Brown. Marleau emphasized the importance of positive self-talk, saying, “Make sure you talk to yourself like you talk to a teammate.”


Marleau’s wisdom resonated deeply with Brown. He realized that the negative self-talk he indulged in was undermining his confidence and clarity on the ice. By shifting to a more compassionate inner dialogue, Brown not only improved his mental resilience but also saw a remarkable transformation in his performance.





Why Self-Kindness Matters


  1. Builds Resiliency: When you are kind to yourself, you create a mental environment where you can recover from setbacks more quickly. This resiliency is crucial in high-stakes situations, whether in sports or other areas of life.

  2. Enhances Clarity and Focus: Negative self-talk clouds judgment and increases stress. By being kind to yourself, you maintain a clearer mind, which is essential for making quick, effective decisions under pressure.

  3. Boosts Confidence: Self-kindness fosters a sense of self-worth and confidence. When you believe in yourself, you are more likely to take risks and push your boundaries, leading to growth and success.


Applying Self-Kindness in Tough Situations


Brown’s experience is a powerful reminder that the way we talk to ourselves can significantly impact our ability to perform in challenging situations. Here are some practical ways to cultivate self-kindness:

  • Positive Self-Talk: Replace negative thoughts with encouraging and supportive ones. Speak to yourself as you would to a trusted friend or teammate.

  • Mindfulness Practices: Engage in mindfulness exercises that help you stay present and reduce the influence of negative thoughts.

  • Self-Compassion: Practice self-compassion by acknowledging your struggles without judgment and treating yourself with the same kindness you would offer to others.


Connor Brown’s story is a great example of the transformative power of self-kindness. By changing his inner dialogue, he built the resilience, clarity, and confidence needed to excel under pressure. Let his experience inspire us all to be kinder to ourselves, fostering a mindset that not only enhances our performance but also enriches our overall well-being.


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