EP 318 - Be the Man in Someone’s Corner
- Govindh Jayaraman
- 12 minutes ago
- 5 min read
There are times in life when wisdom doesn’t show up quietly. It doesn’t whisper. It doesn’t tap you gently on the shoulder. Sometimes it arrives like a jolt — like your heart recognizing something before your brain can process it. That’s how this episode began.
If you’ve been following along, you know it’s been a hard season in our home. Stacey’s father — my father-in-law — has been moving through the final stages of his cancer journey. And while there is an entire conversation to be had about the health, the living, and the complexity of that experience… this message isn’t about that part.
This one is about emotion. The kind that sits heavy and deep. The kind that reshapes you quietly.
It started with a simple clip of Steve Harvey telling a story about his dad. In it, he said something that froze me in place:
“Your father is the only man who truly wants you to be better than him. The only one who can say ‘I’m proud of you’ without competition.”
And as he said it, he broke — emotionally — because when his father died, he knew he’d never hear those words again.
That landed in me with a weight I wasn’t expecting. Not because of loss. Not because of fear. But because of truth.
Over the last few months, I’ve been having deep conversations about masculinity — real masculinity. Not the loud, performative kind. Not the kind wrapped in bravado or posturing. I’m talking about the lived kind. The grounded kind. The kind that holds space for vulnerability, accountability, tenderness, and strength all at once.
And I’ve been doing this in community with other men — real, honest conversations where ego takes a back seat and presence takes the lead.
So when I heard Harvey’s words… they sparked something.
Because I’m lucky. I have a father who calls me to remind me of who I can be. A father who tells me he’s proud. A father who truly wants me to be better than he was. That is a rare gift. One I don’t take lightly.
And then it hit me — I feel the exact same way about my children.
I want my sons to be better than me. I want my daughter to be better than me. Not in the way the world measures “better,” but in depth of character, in presence, in courage, in self-trust.
And it goes further still: I realized I want this for my friends too.
Not just that they succeed… but that they surpass their own expectations. That they rise higher. That they win. That they become the absolute best versions of themselves.
It’s strange to say this out loud, because men aren’t really taught to cheer for each other that way. We’re taught competition, comparison, stoicism, silence.
But silence has been doing a lot of damage.
So a few weeks ago, I made a small — but life-shifting — decision:
I would no longer be the silent man in the corner. I would be the active one.
The one who sends the message. The one who checks in. The one who says the thing out loud instead of assuming they know. The one who tells his friends he’s proud of them. The one who reminds them they matter.
Every week now, I’ve been sending short notes to the men in my life. Notes like:
“I believe in you.” “I’m proud of you.” “You’re doing better than you think.” “You matter to me.”
And the responses reveal something profound:
Men don’t hear this often. Sometimes not at all.
In a world full of noise, what’s missing is something incredibly simple — active encouragement. Not advice. Not fixing. Not lecturing. Encouragement.
And in the middle of all this reflection — the emotional weight of watching my father-in-law’s final chapter, the Steve Harvey moment, the conversations with other men — a parable emerged.
THE CORNERMAN — A PARABLE
There was once a young fighter named Sam. Talented. Strong. Smart. But he couldn’t win. Not once.
Every fight ended the same way. He’d enter the ring hopeful… and leave defeated.
After one especially tough loss, Sam sat in the change room, crushed. A retired fighter — an older man sweeping the hallway — wandered in and said, “Rough night.”
Sam nodded.
“You’ve got talent,” the man said, “but that’s not your problem.”
Sam looked up.
“Kid… you’re losing because you don’t have a corner.”
Sam frowned. His coach was right there.
But the old man shook his head.
“I didn’t say a coach. I said a corner. A corner is the place you go when you’re hurt. The place where someone wipes the blood from your face. Where no one judges you. Where someone speaks truth into you, not doubt. A fighter without a corner doesn’t lose because he’s weak… He loses because he’s alone.”
That one idea changed Sam’s entire career — and his life.
He didn’t just learn how to fight. He learned what it means to be supported. And eventually, he became that man for others.
Because we all need someone in our corner. And we all have the ability — and responsibility — to be a corner for someone else.
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS (For Entrepreneurs & Leaders)
1. Encouragement Is a Leadership Skill
Most leaders underestimate the power of saying, “I’m proud of you.” Encouragement is not soft — it is strategic.
Take Action: This week, tell one person on your team something specific you’re proud of. Name it. Say it.
2. Don’t Wait for People to Ask
Most people won’t ask for support. Initiation is what separates real leadership from passive friendship.
Take Action: Send one check-in message today without being prompted.
3. Men Need Active Support, Not Silent Approval
Silence leaves too much room for doubt. Active encouragement builds identity and confidence.
Take Action: Choose one man in your life and tell him something you admire about him.
4. Strength Isn’t Stoicism — It’s Presence
Real masculinity isn’t about withholding emotion; it’s about holding space.
Take Action: Practice one moment of emotional presence today — with your partner, a friend, or your child.
5. Become the Corner You Needed
We all needed someone at some point. Leadership is becoming that person for the next generation.
Take Action: Make encouraging one person per week a non-negotiable ritual.
THE NAPKIN IDEA
If everything in this message could fit on one napkin, it would say:
“Be the man in someone’s corner.”
(Say it out loud.)
Because no one wins alone. And the man who shows up for others becomes a man others trust, follow, and grow because of.
CALL TO ACTION
I want you to take this idea and make it real.
Write down the name of one person — just one — who needs to hear something today.
Then write your message on a paper napkin (yes, literally). Take a photo. Post it. Tag it with #PaperNapkinWisdom.
Let’s normalize active encouragement. Let’s show the world what leadership looks like in real life.
🌐 Website
▶️ YouTube Channel
🎧 Podcast Links
Comments